Twilight- Is there more to it than childish rants?

You would love the book if you are either a pre-teen girl or a die hard romantic. The first few chapters are nothing short of banal-with the half baked writing being so frustratingly childish that it makes you want to fling the book in the nearest dustbin. But if you actually have the patience to plough through those rants, you come across an enchanting representation of love.
The conversations that that take place between Edward and Bella have been drawn out with such finesse that it melts your heart every time they utter a word. Even though the backdrop remains shaky and the storyline bears a sad resemblance to J K Rowling's writing style, the author manages to play her strength- drawing out a gooey love story that makes it impossible to put the book down. It could have easily been an ordinary teenage love saga but the sheer simplicity of love that is depicted here is neither childish nor ordinary in any sense. There is nothing here that makes you scoff at the idea of 'yet another' teenage girl-vampire love story, even though the storyline has been thoroughly beaten down to death by a gazillion filmmakers/authors already. The creativity, in fact, lies in the way the author carefully chalks out a beautiful relationship. A little piece of conversation like:

"I love you" I said.
"You are my life now" He said simply.

seems so odinary when you think about it but it actually manages to give you goosebumps.

Read it if you are a 'Mills & Boons' kind of a person. If not, there is nothing extraodinary about it. Its like watching a chick flick- you like it, you hate the fact that you liked it and you would never admit to anyone that you actually enjoyed it.

At least I won't ;P

Rain Rain go away

I used to think that I love monsoon- until now! I'm sure that you love it when you laze around in your verandah, munching on those garam garam pakode with 'pudine ki chutney'. It is indeed a heavenly season if you are living a sedentary lifestyle. But what I hate is the humidity and how you sweat like a pig even when you move your finger, and god forbid if you are actually indulging in a full fledged workout. Here are some tips to keep yourself hydrated:

1) Keep on sipping water throughout the day. Don't wait until your throat is parched, it means that you are already on the verge of being dehydrated.

2) Stay away from caffeine, it seeps water from your body and will increase your chances of getting dehydrated.

3) Drink plenty of water before and after the workout. If you feel squeamish/puke-ish during a workout after having water, don't drink water DURING the workout. Your body can't digest something and circulate excessive blood (which is needed during the workout) at the same time.

4) Have tea, lemon water or other healthy substitutes if you can't bring yourself to drink plain water.

5) Add a dash of lemon, mint, a portion of 100% fruit juice or a slice of a fruit to spice up your drink.

If you don't keep your body hydrated, you'll just end up having severe cramps which will hinder your workout routine. Even though cramps shouldn't be ignored when you are strength training (they go in sync with the healing of muscle), they can be more or less avoided when you are purely indulging in cardio.

New York

I’m still unsure if I want to write this review or not but it happens to be one of the handful of Hindi movies I have seen this year and in a drought of mind numbing crap Bollywood has churned out so far, it was at least mildly entertaining, if not more. The storyline isn’t as taut as it could have been and the performances are not extraordinary but then again, it is an ordinary film- and amidst the hooting and casual remarks that peppered the atmosphere of the movie hall, it wasn’t boring.
Neil Nitin Mukesh was perhaps the biggest let down. I wonder if it was the character that was supposed to be that way, or his acting skills are nothing like what people rave about. Gone were his attitude and piercing eyes, and we were introduced to an ordinary boy who could have been anyone. John Abraham was the only actor (except Irfan) who managed to churn out a decent performance. In fact the scenes in the detention center actually manage to horrify you and John played his part with absolute conviction. I remember reading somewhere that John had had an emotional breakdown while the shooting of these scenes. No wonder it turned out the way it did! I was mortified to see his bulging muscles though. What happened to the lean look of dostana?? We appreciate the endless hours you are spending in the gym John, but that buffed up look is both passé and puke inducing :/ Katrina’s acting skills are still the same- NIL :| Although she did what she was hired to do- be an eye candy. And judging by the drooling that could have resulted in a tsunami when she appeared on the screen, she is a perfectionist. Irfan Khan, with his unusual humor and sarcastic remarks, managed to leave a mark.
As for the storyline, it was like a slide show of scenes that came and went. The editing is nothing short of pathetic. When it comes to music, ‘Hai Junoon’ manages to touch your heart (I absolutely loved the lyrics- Kabhi …..jo milenge raaste, pal mein hi chamkegi hasi purani toh; Kaho …kya kahoge phir haimen, Kaise chupaoge nami ye palkon ki) The others songs are hardly noteworthy but I’d like to thank the director for refraining from adding the usual song and dance sequence that cuts you off from the film itself.
There were numerous desperate attempts to make the actual message of the film clear but somewhere along the line, it eludes you. Although I’m sure this film was made with a clear heart, but the part that actually left the hall speechless were when the credits were about to roll on and a series of typed messages concerning the actual incidents that had took place in America during the Twin Tower incident appeared. Even though there were scattered laughs when a partially naked John was being tortured and hooting when Neil shot a man, the pin drop silence was piercing as everyone squinted their eyes to read the message.
On the whole, it is not a bad entertainer. I’m sure it would become a semi-hit (despite of the patchy storyline and poor performances) but it has its flaws. Maybe I’m still reeling under information overload as a prior student of ‘Medium of Cinema’ ;P but the film has countless glitches. Do watch this film if:

*You love John and Katrina (In a completely shallow I-love-the-way-you-look-even-if-your-acting-skills-are-non-existent sort of way)
*You want to watch a decent enough film (It is better than the films it is pitted against)
*you want to watch a film with your family (Sans the torture scene and a brief make out session between John and Katrina, the film is hardly cringe-worthy)
*You want to watch a feel good film. The initial flashback of NY University is particularly refreshing (With 'Hai Junoon' playing in the backdrop)
*You want to witness a puppy eyed Neil drooling ever Katrina (It practically melts your heart every time he does that :))
The film does have its moments, I just wish there were more of them.

Don’t watch this film if:

*You want to watch a serious film based on 9/11 (ha!)
* You have too many expectations from Neil Nitin Mukesh
*You actually believed it when the director said in an interview that he has managed to bring out an extraordinary performance from Katrina (I love the girl but this is the height of exaggeration)
*You want to see a fast paced film (It doesn’t move at a snail’s pace but I didn’t exactly feel that I missed something when I went out to get popcorn)


For a cross between a masala flick and a film with a message (coming from a Muslim director who was pestered to no extent after the recent Mumbai incident) it is not bad. But yes, it is going to be forgotten on any coming Friday that churns out a better film.

Th(re)e Mistakes of my life

I don’t like to leave a book halfway through-no matter how intolerable it may seem. Maybe it the curiosity about what might happen in the end or maybe it is the optimism that it might lead ANYWHERE except steadily going downhill. Here are a couple of books/authors I have found positively puke inducing

The Chetan Bhagat Saga




Yes, Five Point Someone had a shimmer of what a bestseller should be like: An intelligent storyline, a backdrop you find it hard not to connect with, characters that form a varied spectrum you can relate to. When the author is an IIT-ian, you find it hard to question his Intelligence. But I found his imaginative skills poor, if not completely pathetic. The major flaw in his books is the inconsistency. One well written portion can’t cover up countless glitches in the storyline that are littered throughout the book. His books are just an apt example of what a bestseller should not be: A banal story that gets tiring after a while. His books are not sheer trash, but I couldn’t bring myself to jump across the loopholes his storyline presented with every turn of the page.

P.S I love you



For some reason, I haven’t come across a girl who didn’t like it. The truth is, I WANTED to like it. I found the storyline irresistibly unique. But I just couldn’t get past the first couple of pages. I had a hard time trying to decipher why the book appeared to be downright boring. Maybe I was expecting something exquisite, and coming across an unadorned storyline was a let down. Or maybe it is just overrated.


Sidney Sheldon


I haven’t come across anyone who is into novels and doesn’t like Sidney Sheldon. The truth is, I actually like his books. I love them for the sheer perfection his characters spell. Maybe it is the way they are drawn out-bit by bit- it is like a stroke of artistic beauty I have always found fascinating. Combine it with a mediocre storyline and something which I can’t call anything else but pornography and you have a Sidney Sheldon book in your hand. Of course, there are a couple of books with well etched storylines that surprise you every once in a while.

The Monk who sold his Ferrari


You can only like this book if you KNOW you are being preached and you don’t mind it. If you are reading this book with a naïve state of mind-not knowing what to expect, I would seriously doubt your common sense. I won’t deny that the book has an interesting aspect to it. There were certain portions that were breathtaking, things I knew all along but the book made me see them with a different perspective. But you have to actually skim through the book to pick out those rare gems. Besides the author maintains such a monotonic tone throughout the book, that all I could do was yawn and put it away. Maybe I would read it again when I’m ready for the preaching but as of now, I have had more than my share of self actualization.

Paulo Coelho




There is a certain beauty to ‘The Alchemist’ I couldn’t find in any other book of a similar genre. The sad part is, I couldn’t find that beauty in any other book by Coelho. Every other book of his is a desperate attempt to match up to the original bestseller. And the attempt is not just evident, it is pathetic.

Salmonella Scare: PB, Pistachios; Swine Flu!! What next??

I just bought Peanut Butter for the first time EVER and as luck would have had it, I came across a couple of articles about the Salmonella scare that is doing rounds in USA lately. As the PB I had got was from an American Company, I had every right to be concerned. After reading a series of horrifying posts about people who were suffering from severe symptoms that pointed towards food poisoning, I decided the most logical thing to do was to throw it away. I decided to tell my dad about it, lest he decided to take a scoop from the bottle.

Me: I'm going to to throw away the Peanut Butter
Dad (trying to comprehend why on earth I would want to do that): Huh? Why?
Me: I don't know. I just read that FDA is recalling all Peanut based products. I'm not sure which specific brands are involved
Dad: Why are you throwing it away, I'll return it tomorrow.
Me: I don't think so. There hasn't been any case of Salmonella contamination in India. They won't take it back.
Dad: You mean it isn't contaminated?
Me: um... No?
Dad: Why were we throwing it out again?
Me: :|

I'm guessing I'm just being my usual hyper self. I just want these jerks to stop inventing new diseases before I have a coronary! OK, I'm glad that the human mind is discovering new diseases every day (No,I'm not being sarcastic) And even if we haven't found the cure to every disease, we don't wander around not knowing the truth behind our not-so-perfect bodily conditions.Besides, my fear about the PB being contaminated melted away when Pistachios became the next Salmonella victim, then Alfalfa Sprouts. After that, I decided that it was time to stop keeping track of the diseases dwelling in another continent, buy desi stuff and forget about it.
Now I'll just fret about the onset of Swine Flu :/

Slumdog Millionaire: the overrated fiesta that just won't get over!, The American Tourist and blah!

It was a usual Monday morning, mundane and uninspiring. Despite of it being a holiday, it was hard to escape the blues Monday morning brings the moment you open your eyes. As tempted as I was to hit the snooze button, I'm glad I didn't. Had I done that, I would've missed the sight of a lifetime. ( OK, maybe not a lifetime, but it was still more amusing than dozing off after 9 hours of sleep :| ) On the deserted roads of Model Town Market was an American Tourist frantically jumping up and down with joy- pointing at a cow sitting right in the middle of the road. "Its a cow!" He screamed with such delight that I wondered if cows have become extinct in America. What followed was his digital camera taking shots of the cow from every possible angle. Was he insane? Or maybe he was just a typical American with a fascination towards Indian poverty.
That brings me to an over hyped & overrated film, which for some weird reason, made it to the Oscars. And no, you do not get any points for guessing the right answer.



Our hearts still swell with joy whenever someone even utters the word "Slumdog" or if they are playing "Jai ho" at the local radio station (No wonder Congress is trying to cash on it. Not that I care, politics is hardly my forte and no, that is nothing I am proud of) I'm not going to bash this film because the director is not of Indian descent, or if the Slum bit was overplayed to gather public sympathy for the lead character. I don't believe that it was-overplayed, that is. To create a 'Rags to Riches' scenario, you need to show the rags, and a background locale that goes in sync with it. And when you think about poverty, India is almost a synonym. The critics said that it created a wrong image of India for our western counterparts. But then again, it shows a side of India that is still alive and vibrant, morbid and demented. Dharavi is a part of India we can't shy away from. So I'm not going to rant on about how the Americans still slot us as beggars and thieves(I mean, come on! Even we slot them as immoral, dumb maniacs who don't deserve the money they are minting) Yes, there is more to India than Snake Charmers, Mango Trees, Ayurveda, Yoga and Aishwarya Rai. (Not to forget our 'Cash-Meer' issue :/) But anyone with an IQ that isn't drooping in a negative spectrum can decipher that. So why do we even bother to defend ourselves when there is nothing to defend.
And remind me again, what is so extra-ordinary about 'Jai ho'? It is a catchy, foot tapping tune that gets banal after a while. But then again, A R Rehman is a maestro. Saying anything against him is a sin I won't commit. (Oh wait, I already have :|) When everything is said and done, I'm proud of the fact that the guy made it to the Oscars. (Well, my inner patriot is anyway) Kudos for him :)

Anyway, I just found out that 'Anyways' is grammatically incorrect. It makes as much sense as saying 'Anyhows'
Who knew!